So many feelings...

I don't even know where to begin...

I guess I kind of went on a not-really a date yesterday? I mean we did visit the Griffith Observatory and like it was sort of romantic with couples all around us. I'm pretty sure he tried to make a couple moves the whole night & offered to pay for dinner. 

But the thing is...

It's not him, it's ME.

I mean I know it's a common phrase and everything, but really it is! He's a nice guy and I'm sure he did everything right. It's just that, I don't go for nice guys. Which really is my problem. I know the person is up to know good and we're bad for each other but it's like the hope that one day things change that keeps me going. Is it weird? Maybe.

Also, I guess I AM kind of leading him on? But attention is nice... for a change. It's weird because he accepts me... as me? Like the whole package. Weirdness and all. And I know I'm odd at times and it puts off a lot of people. But it doesn't seem to scare him off. He sees it as unique and interesting. 

Now I know how CHAIR (Chuck and Blair) shippers feel.

I'm a firm DAIR (Dan and Blair) shipper because THAT'S how a girl is SUPPOSED to be treated. He is SUPPOSED to be head over heels for her, have everything in common, and do everything to get her back. He also accepts who she is as a person, and doesn't try to change her or bring out the worst in her. He challenges her intellectually. He does not take her for granted because he knows she will always be there waiting for him. Yeah I'm hypocrite. I want a Chuck archetype in my life & won't settle for a Dan. I understand everything now.

Yeah, I really need to get a move on with my research stuff. It's like I don't know what to do... too scared. 

Read more

2012: Another Reflection!

Well... unlike last year where I didn't do all that much, 2012 has been truly great to me. As usual, I panicked about school (not getting in anywhere & not passing classes). Which, I guess turned out to be okay. 

Life is weird that way. For as long as I could remember, I've always wanted to go to UCSD. But you know what? I'm at UCLA now & content with it. 

I also went on an incredible 2 month trip to Vietnam. Though, I didn't really do all the things I wanted, it was an amazing experience to venture out on my own and be an independent person for once.  

So let's see what 2011 New Years Resolutions I've accomplished: 

1. Try new things

I guess I did this! New school, new experiences. Met new people. A+ for me!

2. Be healthy

HAHA. no. And also near the end of 2012, I'm pretty sure I had a chronic cough for like 8 weeks. This one never stood a chance.

3. Be the change you want to be

I'm not so sure on this. But I guess in a way I did follow my instincts. However, I'm not quite there yet, because I haven't reached my full potential. I'm still stuck on the "meh" phase. 

So I read somewhere that when you do a New Years Resolution, you are less likely to do it because by telling someone else you already feel enough gratitude to not do it... if that makes sense? Well, I like doing them because then there is a list I can refer back to and just keep it in my mind. 

Thank you 2012. You were great. Here's to hoping 2013 is just as eventful and wonderful!

And my 2013 New Years Resolutions are:

1. Be healthy

How about we just keep this one.. for the sake of keeping this one. Maybe one year I will actually follow through with this. *crosses fingers*

2. Get better grades

Oh wow something school related! Well I didn't do as well as I had hoped to last quarter. Here is to hoping that I do better! 

3. Be more productive/active

Which means.. LAND THOSE RESEARCH PROJECTS & ACTUALLY VOLUNTEER. I know it's a lot of work and I'm beginning to question my career path again. But you never know if you don't try right?

Well that's all for now.. ON WITH THE SHOW!

Read more